A Toast to Myself

A Toast to Myself
Pink Narcissus by Juan José Barboza-Gubo

So, it’s been a year since I began my journey with mySELF. I highlight the word because, well, she matters. And as you read this, I hope you realize the importance of yourSELF.

September 2020 was when I not only gave myself time but also space. Yes! I gave myself space! I let myself take the whole month and explore what I am capable of. I began from conquering early morning, which those who know me, know is a pretty big accomplishment!

I was in the habit of talking to myself before this, but from here on I began listening to myself more.

Also, ignoring her less, observing her, and making mental notes about her behavior as I do with other people. And as I did all these things, I began to learn about mySELF exponentially. Observing little things about others tells us a lot about them, well guess what, the same works for ourselves!

As I noticed little flinches in my body and my head about some things, I realized how I don’t want to do them. And knowing what you don’t want to do, I’d say is more important than knowing what you want to do. Figuring things out always takes time, but what’s important is to listen to our intuition, our gut, because they are always right!

I cannot express how profoundly I feel connected to me, and to the people who I am coming across now. People from my gym, fellow MSdians from VIT, those on social media, strangers I have a quick interaction with on the streets or grocery stores, whoever. Why? Well, since I am able to communicate with myself better, I am able to better communicate my needs with others as well.

And you know, this actually came as a surprise to me, because I thought I was likely to enjoy more alone time, when in fact I realized how much I love being around people, so now, all I do is I figure out ways to achieve that.

I read this somewhere, ‘You connect with others as deeply as you connect with yourself.’ Well, turns out it’s true!

You see? I am able to pull my boundaries and push them in much healthier ways, and grow for real.

And now, through the entire year, I have come to love myself so dearly that I’d like to say this as a toast to her, ‘May I be with mySELF for a full half-hour, before the devil knows I’m dead.’

Ritika Tiwari

Ritika Tiwari

I am a 22 year old student of MSc Data Science at Vellore Institute of Technology (I Year). I graduated with a degree in computer applications (B.C.A). Prior to this, I worked as an Academic Content Writer at Locus Rags.

Coming from Benaras and then growing up in Indore, I enjoy the streets and socializing immensely. I like to read, listen to music and travel. I keep picking up new hobbies once in a while, like painting, sewing, and crafting, but my favourite activities include thinking, writing, and conversing with people, particularly strangers. The lockdown of 2020 played a significant role in shaping my individuality. It was during this time that I began writing. Soon, writing became an internal affair for me. It was after this that I began to communicate exclusively with myself. It not only helped me explore my abilities in all aspects of life, but also  made me understand how I always let my curiosity lead the way. As I began to put my thoughts in words, they gradually gained shape and molded into my beliefs, opinions, perceptions on everything around me. 


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